I just saw the Oscar nominations list. First of all, I would like to make it known that, just like everything else in the world, I don't give a Sim's digital shit about the Oscars. It's unfortunate, because I totally give a shit about movies. I love them. I mean, except the ones that I hate. But I'm a flannel-wearing, skinny-jeans-lovin', Ray Ban-sportin' film freak. Like I said, it's unfortunate.
But after reading this latest list of nominees, I must say I actually feel a little better. It's official that these awards are actual horse shit.
If "The Tree of Life" wins an Oscar, then I should win an Oscar for wiping my own ass.
You're telling me that all I have to do is steal footage from a telescope, digitally insert dinosaurs into a forest, and have some creepy child whisper "MOTHER....FATHER....BROTHER....COUSIN-I-MADE-OUT-WITH-AT-THAT-WEDDING-ONCE-BUT-ITS-OKAY-SHES-LIKE-MY-SECOND-COUSIN-IM-PRETTY-SURE" and then add scenes of Sean Penn walking through a fancy building.
THAT'S NOT A FUCKING MOVIE. That's some asshole jacking off all over a fancy digital camera and then rubbing his nips in our faces while we watch it.
Fuck. That.
But I don't know. Maybe I'm just bitter because "Step Up 2 the Streets" never got the nomination it deserved.
I'm still reeling...
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