Somebody help me the fuck out. Did I miss something? Well, obviously I did because when the fuck did it become a law that hot Asian chicks can only date gangly, white Jewish nerds?!?!?
I mean, I love nerds. They are smart and witty and always know how much to tip, so I don't have to try to figure it out and embarrass myself. And they always never drink so you know you have a ride home if you pass out at the party. And if you pass out naked, you know you won't get raped. I mean, your boobs might get touched, but that's probably it.
But I'm not talking about any white nerds, and I'm not talking about any hot Asian chicks. I'm talking about the Stephen Hawking (and no, you sick fucks, I'm not making a disability reference, I mean he is literally the biggest nerd science has to offer) of white guys and the if-Lucy-Liu-and-Bai-Ling-had-a-baby of hot Asian chicks.
Why are they all dating each other?? Maybe I'm a little edgy because it's my goal in life to marry a rich Jew, and now it looks like I'll have to fight a bunch of hot Asian chicks to the death to achieve this goal, and you know those bitches are all ninjas underneath their big fake boobs and Hello Kitty backpacks! Yes, I went there. Chia Pet. Tamagachi. I'm racist. Wanna fight?
So, listen. I love all races (except British [is that a race?]) but STEP THE FUCK OFF MY JEWS. Or at least leave me one.
Arigato gozaimasu, bitches.
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