Writing a blog is too hard. And this isn't even a real blog. It doesn't have any useful information on it. So I would like to try and pick a theme for my blog!
Political? Can't do it. Politics are way too hilarious right now. The jokes write themselves, so it's a waste of time for anyone to try to make jokes about them.
Food? Fuck that. I'm tired of blogs that are like, "Hey!! Want to eat like a fucking pig and never gain weight? Here are some disgusting recipes for brownies and pie with no calories and they take days to make!"
Like, are you joking? I'm reading a blog about losing weight by eating, so obviously I'm a lazy fuck who can't even be bothered to work out once in a while. Do you really think I'm going to slave over a hot stove just to make some nasty wheat germ muffins that taste like dick, when the grocery store down the street is filled with glorious boxes of Entenmann's factory made fudgepies?? No!
Then there are the food blogs written by anorexic chicks who pretend they eat a shit ton when they really don't. They put up pictures of fat homemade pizzas and blondie bars and they're like, "Hehe! Be careful if you make this recipe, I totally couldn't stop myself and ate the whole thinglol!!" They didn't. But they tell you that so that you'll eat it and be fat and disgusting and they're still Skeletor and you're like DAAAAMN YOU HOW ARE YOU DOING THAT?? Well, they're not eating. Fatty.
Music? Can't do it. Every time I find good music, I never tell people about it. It's mine.
So I guess this blog can't be anything but what it is. What is it? Fuck off.
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